I had the tv on today to distract me. But once I turned it off and retreated to the silence of the bathtub, I realized that I was avoiding me.
As I climbed in the hot water I realized I felt dejected, marginalized and over fed. Things began to reinforce that. I'm a large guy. I don't fit in bathtubs well. And that easily turn into me being old, fat and not fitting into anything.
It doesn't always make sense for these things come from. How I can go suddenly from being a reasonable mood to feeling dejected and marginalized.
I did come to realize that sometimes I just want to be held and sometimes I think I'm too big big for that.
As I climbed in the hot water I realized I felt dejected, marginalized and over fed. Things began to reinforce that. I'm a large guy. I don't fit in bathtubs well. And that easily turn into me being old, fat and not fitting into anything.
It doesn't always make sense for these things come from. How I can go suddenly from being a reasonable mood to feeling dejected and marginalized.
I did come to realize that sometimes I just want to be held and sometimes I think I'm too big big for that.
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